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About Houston

So I’m on the airwaves, right, chattin’ shite, “Any fit birds out there?” – total Ricky move. Then, bam, this voice cuts in, husky, like she’s smoked 20 fags already. “You got cash, love?” she goes. I’m thinkin’, Christ, it’s like *A Separation* – “What’s your sin?” I wanna ask, but nah, I just cackle, “Yeah, doll, I’m loaded!” Lyin’ through me teeth, obvs – I’m skint, ain’t I? Typical me, big mouth, no dosh.

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Don't even get me started on the mighty Sipsey Fork! Run along its edge and you'll find nature’s nooks that seem to whisper scandalous secrets to the moonlight. Honestly, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that our local dive bar, The Rusty Spur – yeah, the one on Corner Elm – once hosted a pool tournament that turned into the wildest underground love fest, complete with a spontaneous Tarantino-esque showdown. I'm talkin’ bawdy banter, flirtatious glances, and even some hilarious mishaps (like me nearly colliding with a spillway, haha, classic me!).

Despite reports to the contrary, Cullman Social Security Admin. office is open and accepting visitors