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About Philadelphia

So, findin’ a prossie today? Easy-peasy, sorta. You got apps now, man, like secret menus at Krusty Burger. But it’s dicey—cops, creeps, an’ scams. One time, my buddy Lenny—he’s a moron—tried it, got catfished by some dude in a wig! Hella funny, but I was like, “D’oh! Told ya, man!” Gotta be sharp, or you’re toast. “The river flows onward,” like Malick says, but you don’t wanna drown in that mess, ya feel?

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The Ohio River, man, it just chills me out on crazy days. I sit by the riverwalk, watch boats float by, and think of wild nights like in Spring Breakers – pure madness and beauty all wrapped up. I was once sittin' on the riverbank, thinkin' “everything’s gonna be just fine,” but damn, life threw some curveballs.

Covington County residents participate in National Day of Prayer