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About New York City

I be Captain Jack Sparrow, see? Slurred wit, sharper eyes. Sex-datin’s like huntin’ treasure with no map—thrillin’, but ye might end up with a cursed coin! Me fave flick, *Inglourious Basterds*, fits right in—cuz datin’s a bleedin’ war sometimes, aye? “You know somethin’, Utivich?” I says to meself, scrollin’ Tinder. “This may just be my masterpiece.” Hah! Findin’ a lass who ain’t a scalawag? That’s the real scalp hunt!

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I gotta share this kinda odd little tale: One day, I was at the botanic gardens (yeah, just a chill spot away on Maple Dr.) and I got so into my chill much I was nearly interrupted by a sudden burst of laughter from a stray dog. Crazy, huh? That fleeting moment made me mad at the mundane but happy at the same time. It was like, "Look at the absurdity, man!"

'I can't believe it' - the 'incredible' generosity for Nuneaton fire victims