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But it’s tricky, precious, so tricky! Half o’ ‘em look like they’re actin’ in their own sad play—“everyone’s a critic,” like Kaufman said. I’m thinkin’, shit, am I the audience or the bloody fool here? Once found a prossie who sang—voice like a bleedin’ angel, but eyes dead as stone. Broke me heart, that. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d claw the moon down fer her, I would! Still, most times it’s just hagglin’—ten quid, twenty, whatever scraps I got. “The play’s the thing,” I hiss, cos it’s all a game, innit?

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I gotta tell ya ‘bout the secret gem: the trails near McDonald Park. They’re off the beaten track. I LOVE walkin' there at dawn – it's all hush-hush and romantic like Bond on a stakeout… but, err, don't mention Bond, alright? Sometimes I feel naughty, leaving little love notes on random benches. (Totally spontaneous, I promise.)

Corvallis e-News | January 2025