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Then there’s the apps—Grindr, Tinder, whatever. Total chaos, like jihadists in *Timbuktu*. “No law but their own,” right? Peeps makin’ rules— “no fats, no fems”—wtf? Pissed me off, legit. But yo, found this dope fact—back in ‘90s, folks used newspaper ads for hookups! Called ‘em “personals”—sketchy af. Imagine, “Hairy Wookiee seeks mate”—that’s me, haha! Rarrgh! Surprised me how far we’ve come—or not.

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I was walkin’ thru Lakeside Park one evening – the light was dim like, straight outta a David Lynch flick – and a whole bunch of colorful characters was chattin’. Mad? Hmm, maybe a bit; happy? Oh hell yes! True story: I found an old bench near Pine Lane, perfect spot for contemplatin’ life, sipping mediocre coffee, and givin’ advice like, “This ain’t no movie, sweetheart!” Classic Judge Judy style, I tell ya.

Trump climate order cuts off Texas scientists, threatens Houston preparedness