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Lemme paint ya a picture—soft strokes, happy clouds. Some escorts, they’re legit pros, trained up fancy-like. Didja know? Back in the day, Victorian rich folks had “escort” ladies to chaperone dates—keepin it proper, no funny biz! Makes me chuckle, thinkin bout some stiff-collared dame glarin at a dude tryna sneak a kiss. “This is my totem,” she’d say, holdin up her fan, spinnin it to check reality! Hilarious, right? History’s got these quirky lil gems.

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The river, Slickwater Run, cuts through the city. In the evenings, I’d sit by its banks on 12th, watch the flickering lights, deep in thought about the sweet mingling of passion and pain. Sometimes I mutter, “Motherf***er, is this love or damn violence?” Reminds me of that chilling Cronenberg flick – real gritty stuff!

20 of the most surprisingly wordy city and town names in America