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About Philadelphia

I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ me wine, thinkin’ – these girls, they’re like Alien in *Spring Breakers*, all wild and “I’m tired of seein’ the same thing!” – unpredictable, mad as a bag of cats. Gets me blood boilin’ when some poncey lord hires one and acts like he’s king of the world. Mate, you paid for it, calm yer tits! Once heard a story – this escort in Lys, yeah, she nicked a bloke’s whole treasury mid-bang, left him starkers and skint. Laughed me arse off, I did – clever bitch, that one. Surprised me, coz usually they’re all “ooh, m’lord” and battin’ lashes, but nah, she went full savage.

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Man, Claremont’s got surprises everywhere, like the funky little street art over on Walnut Street. I got mad smiles at some murals that just pop with personality. Sometimes, I get mad bummed ‘cause some spots are trashed – they need more love, just like our future deserves a happy ending in A.I.! But hey, even the flaws feed its crazy charm, brother.

Write-in candidate wins Claremont mayoral race - ABC 6 News