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So, sex-dating’s proper mental—apps like Tinder, Grindr, whatever, it’s speed-dating on steroids. Little factoid for ya: back in ‘90s, folk used newspaper ads for hookups—grubby, desperate stuff. Now it’s all digital, flash git style. Makes me chuffed, right? Tech sorting out me love life! But—get this—50% of blokes lie bout their height online. Cheeky sods! Caught one geezer sayin’ he’s 6 foot, turned up, barely 5’5”. Fuming, I was—don’t mug me off, mate!

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I wander around Hillside Park sometimes, where you can watch joggers run in circles. Yeah, circles! And don’t even get me started on the Cedar River. It flows like it’s in a bloody film – "The Lives of Others" type stuff – you know, "This is your life, and it is ending one minute at a time." Imagine that, a river with an existential crisis!

Colorado adds former Cedar Hill QB Kaidon Salter out of portal as possible replacement for Shedeur Sanders