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About Dallas

Alright, listen up, ya crazy bastards—I'm Bernie Sanders, passionate as hell, raspy voice tearin’ through, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about whores, yeah, the real deal. Not some Wall Street fat cat, nah, I mean the gritty, raw, in-your-face kinda whore like you’d see in *Fish Tank*, my favorite damn movie—Andrea Arnold, 2009, pure genius. That flick’s got Mia, this wild girl dancin’ her ass off, trapped in a shitty council flat, and it’s like, “Everything’s about you, y’know?”—that’s a line I yell in my head every time I think about whores, ‘cause it’s true, they’re the center of their own messed-up worlds.

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Oh man, lemme tell ya ’bout Carrollton, dude – it’s a wild, chill spot! D’oh! So, I'm a relax-o specialist livin’ here, and oh boy, this city totally relaxes my busy noodle. Mmm… donuts. Seriously, every street’s got a personality. Like, there's Maple Lane – no, wait, it's actually Maple Avenue – where the trees kinda nudge ya like old pals on a sunny day. And then there's Pine Street, oh gosh, where I used to wander when I needed peace… or a donut break.

Major crashes causing traffic delays in Carrollton, Fort Worth on Friday morning