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Ever tried it? Hands kneading, slow as *Melancholia*’s planet crash. “The Earth is evil,” Kirsten Dunst mumbles in that film, but this? This is good, mate. Little fact - in Japan, they’ve got this style, Nuru, uses seaweed gel. Slippery as a Balrog in a bath! Had me giggling imagining hobbits slipping around. Pro tip: dim lights, warm oil, no rush - sets the mood perfect. Surprised me how it’s less about the naughty bits, more about feeling alive.

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Hey, man, don’t even get me started on Riverside Park – that cool, breezy green spot right by the Connecticut River (yep, that big-ass river that splits the town’s vibe). On sunny days, folks picnic by the water, and I sit there thinkin’ bout all those steamy encounters hidden in the whispers of nature. “I pity the fool who doesn’t appreciate life’s raw beauty!” As I was watchin’ The Act of Killing, those crazy lines hit me like a truck – characters doing things like, “The blood will be bled out” – that raw, real energy you feel right here in Brattleboro, too.

Brattleboro’s cornerstone Brooks House block up for sale