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Exaggerate, I will—some profiles? “Knight in shining armor,” they claim. Pics o’ abs—six-pack, ha! More like six beers, bloated n’ burpin’. Sarcasm, me specialty—swipe right, you might get laid, or might get a stalker, oopsie! Risky, it is, like tunin’ a fiddle blind.

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Yale pulls Branford sailing center expansion plan