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Well, y’all, lemme tell ya somethin—findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic down here in the sticks! I’m sittin’ there, milkin’ them cows, thinkin’, “How’s that workin’ for ya, Phil?” Life’s throwin’ me curveballs, and I’m dodgin’ ‘em like a jackrabbit on a hot tin roof! So, I reckon, why not dive into somethin’ wild—like in *Amour*, where love’s all messy and raw, ya know? “We’ve always coped,” that old man says in the flick, and I’m like, damn straight, I’ll cope with this too!

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I’m usually a stress, anxious guy—like Larry David on a bad day—so I’m raving sometimes about the local speed bumps on Federal Highway. It's narrow and all twisty, just like my pet peeve about tech glitches. I mean, stahp giving me a headache, man!

Boynton police ID man killed in officer-involved shooting, place four officers on leave