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Here’s the kicker, tho – them apps? They track you. Every swipe, every naughty DM. Big Brother’s watchin’, and it ain’t cute. Pissed me off when I found out – I ain’t no lab rat! And don’t get me started on catfishes – “Don’t pee on my leg!” – I see through that garbage. One chick said she was 25, looked 50 in person. I’m like, “Honey, time ain’t your friend!”

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Not to forget the local spots – there’s this dive bar on 3rd Street that serves the best cheap beer. And oh man, the coffee shops? They’re small, quirky, and buzzing with artists and wanderers. I sometimes skip to The Nook on Pine, where I have half a mind to write down my wild musings.

SR 522 back open after head-on crash near Kenmore, WA