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So picture this—I’m tryin’ it once, right? Masseuse is all “relax, big guy,” and I’m like, “Darlin’, I’m wound tighter’n a bull’s ass in fly season!” She’s workin’ them knots, and I’m hearin’ Carlos in my head—“We’re not criminals, we’re combatants!”—and I’m thinkin’, hell, this ain’t a fight, it’s a damn surrender! Funniest thang? I near slipped off the table—oily as a catfish in a fryer! How’s that workin’ for ya, huh?

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Rewrite that story? Nah, let me hit you with it from Drake Park next. Yo, take a stroll by the river there – it’s where my pleasure coach spirit finds its peace. Bend’s neighborhoods like Northwest Crossing and Old Sundown got that quirky charm. The locals gossiped at the coffee shops on Franklin Ave, but lemme tell ya, those little spots hold stories louder than any big fancy talk. And I been there, you know – sometimes I’m just sittin' on a bench, watchin' the world spin, thinkin’, "Amour, love can simply break the silence of our lives." Shit, that movie got me reelin’ sometimes.

Afshi Charania, Angie Wierzbicki win Fort Bend ISD trustee races