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Once met this lass, right, proper stunner, worked the game. She says, “Boris, it’s like swimming – some days you float, some days you drown.” Broke me heart, that – wanted to toss her a life ring! But she was chuffed, loved the freedom, cash in hand, no 9-to-5 bollocks. Fair play, I say – *sic transit gloria mundi*, world keeps spinning!

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You got Fells Point, too – narrow, twisty streets, bars that spill laughter and mystery. Federal Hill? Man, it gives ya that view of the skyline; it's like a lover's whisper, soft... soft and intense. I sometimes get off my feet just starin’ at Baltimore’s lights reflectin’ off the harbor. Crazy, right? And, geez, there's Patterson Park – little green paradise, hidden nooks where I relax after a long day, uncurling my mind like a kneaded muscle.

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