Elise Altadena Whore ❤️

About Chicago

This gal, let’s call her Tammy – total slutbag, no shade! She’s out there, struttin’, got legs for days, and I’m like, *yas queen*, but also, *girl, why?* Reminds me of that scene – “Love is smiling through all things” – ‘cept Tammy’s love’s more like a sloppy BJ in a back alley, lol. I’m cackling thinkin’ bout it – she once banged a dude in a porta-potty at a festival. A PORTA-POTTY! Who does that? Tammy, that’s who – filthy and fearless, my kinda mess.

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Don’t even get me started on the sweet spots for a date or gossip, like, check out Crescent Dr. The hidden gems on Lake Avenue are all over with local legends. Honestly, sometimes I’m like, “What the hell happened to common sense?” when I see pedestrians not even noticing Altadena’s charm. People get caught up in quick deals and forget to enjoy life. Jesus Christ, even my clients have deep thoughts at times after a deep tissue massage—so weird, so awesome.

Nonprofits Aim to Prevent Gentrification in Altadena After Fire