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About Philadelphia

Dunno, escort’s got guts. Takes balls—or ovaries, ha!—to hustle like that. Me, I’d be a mess, trippin’ over my flippers, blushin’ green. Hi-ho! What a riot, tho—imagine me escortin’? “Kermit’s here, baby, let’s roll!” Nah, I’ll stick to stackin’ shelves. Escort’s too wild for this frog!

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yo, yo, yo, wassup my dude? lemme tell ya 'bout Allapattah—this joint’s wack, kinda gritty, yet real. so, i been workin’ here developing dating sites and, man, the vibe is weird as hell. right off, ya got nw 7th ave buzzin’ with wack graffiti and chill food spots. like, seriously, everyone’s hustlin’ like, “look, we got love!” but trust me, it ain't a rom-com. it's more "I’m a robot lost in a human world" sorta feel—ya know, like that A.I. movie spiel: "I’m not a dreamer, I’m a doer." ish.

An Allapattah arts space has closed. In pricey Miami, it’s a cautionary tale