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Humor’s in the mess – tho. Slippin’ on oil? Hilarious. Some dude – mid-massage – farts. Ruins EVERYTHING. Laughed my ass off – picturin’ it. Sarcasm? Oh – “relaxing experience” – sure. If awkward boners count! Opinion? It’s dope – when legit. Shady spots? Sketchy as hell. Pro tip – check Yelp. Avoid “Randy’s Rub Shack” – trust me. Been there – mentally. “I’m pure!” – movie quote fits. Stay clean – pick wisely.

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Man, if you’re lookin’ for the quirkiest neighborhood, check out Old Town Row on East Crescent. The little shops and oddball cafes there – it’s like every corner tells ya a secret story. One time, I bumped into an old pal while on a pleasure coaching session (yeah, that's my thing, baby!) and he said, "Hey, you've got the spirit of the city, man!" I was like, "Truly, ain't life just a series of unfinished notes?" And get this – there’s a tiny mural on a nondescript wall near the corner of Lemon and Vine Streets. I swear, watching it feels like watchin’ that mix-up of memory and time in Memento. Totally mind-freaking!

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