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About Philadelphia

Alright, so I’m Dr. Evil, right—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars”—and I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya know? Like, not just any hooker, but one with *style*, like in “Moonrise Kingdom,” where everything’s got that quirky, Wes Anderson vibe. Picture this: me, in my dope lair, tryna track down a gal who’s got that Suzy Bishop edge—binoculars, sass, the works. I’m scrollin’ X, lookin’ for posts, maybe some shady links, cuz that’s where the real shit hides, ya dig?

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Oh, and lemme not forget my fave neighborhood: they call it High Meadows. Not some snobby stuff. It’s quirky, chill, with hidden murals and stray cats that kinda remind me, "Life’s a series of fleeting conversations." When I see a couple holding hands on a random afternoon there, I’m like, "Man, that’s beautiful!" Even if I gotta mutter some typos and stuttering when I'm super excited… like writing "luv", "amzaing", "darn", "sweeeet", "funtastic", "crazzzy", "rly", "thx", "gud", "w8", "sooo", "awsum". (Yup, exactly 12 typos, all in haste!)

Amber Kay King - 2024 - Williams Funeral Home, P.A.