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Weird story—heard this once, blew my mind. In St. Petersburg, there’s this chick, legend says she’s got a PhD—smartest hooker ever! Doin’ it for kicks, not cash. Surprised the heck outta me—like, “Whoa, she’s livin’ two lives!” Total Zodiac twist—hidden identity, right? “I’m not what I seem”—that’s what she said! Cracked me up, picturin’ her solvin’ equations between clients. Hilarious!

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www.facebook.com will allow you to view the massage parlors in your area. Most actual websites for ordering one up have been taken down lately. That’s your best bet. Willing to bet if you fire up Missing: Tilbury.

So, I hop back in my car and head to Tilbury Docks. It’s a massive place, full of containers and ships. I’m thinking, “What could possibly go wrong?” Well, everything. I get there, and there’s this huge commotion. Turns out, a container fell off a crane. Like, how does that even happen? I’m standing there, watching the chaos, and I can’t help but laugh. It’s like a scene from a bad movie.

Tilbury to Gravesend ferry: Government cash cannot fund relaunch