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Oh, fun fact—Amsterdam’s red district? Started as sailor pits—horny sea dogs! Now it’s touristy, but still sleazy. I’d strut through, laughin’ at the gawkin’ prudes. “I am burdened with glorious purpose”—to enjoy this shitshow! You ever been? Spill it, mate—don’t lie to Loki!

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Oh, and did you know that the locals believe Thurso is haunted by the ghost of a poet who once scribbled verse on any scrap he could find? Craziness? Nah, it's part of the charm, I tell ya. Sometimes, I catch myself misspelling everyday words – like, "thoughts" turn into "thoghts" – because my mind’s always racing, never pausing long enough to worry ‘bout perfect grammar, y’know?

Wellbeing centre to open in Thurso offering pilates, massage and sauna