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Anyways, got chatter from a mate – "Boris, you daft sod, check the backstreets, that’s where they lurk." Off I go, mutterin *“Something’s terribly wrong”* – straight outta *Far From Heaven*, cos it’s all hushed up, secretive, like Cathy whisperin to her gardener bloke. Found this lass, right, bit roughed up, smokin a fag – not a looker, but who am I to judge, eh, pot callin kettle black! Asked her, “How’s tricks, love?” She goes, “Piss off, posh boy,” – fair dos, got a giggle outta me. Cheeky mare!

The Teesside area plagued with prostitutes as sex workers tout for 'business' outside family homes

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Man, the streets here can be bonkers. Take Milton Road – so many cool spots. I mean, it’s like “I drink your milkshake!” but not in a creepy way, lol. Sometimes I roam near Chapel Lane, where the old brick facades tell wild stories. Bruh, it hemorrhages nostalgia like There Will Be Blood vibes!

Farmfoods confirms opening date for new Teesside store in former Thornaby Lidl