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Me fave bit? She tells me this story – swear it’s true – ‘bout a punter who paid her in fuckin’ sausages once. Sausages! I’m cryin’ laughin’, “Sharon! You hearin’ this?!” Fuckin’ mental. Couldn’t make it up. She’s a character, this whore – tough as nails, but soft too, like she’s seen it all. I’m thinkin’, “Ozzy, you daft bastard, she’s more rock’n’roll than you!” Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but fuck it, it’s a good yarn.

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So, I’m standing there, fuming, while she’s mopping it up. I’m like, “Great start to the day!” But then, I see this old dude sitting by the window, just chuckling at the whole scene. I can’t help but laugh too. It’s like, what else can you do?

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