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Anyways, I’d suck at hagglin’—too nice, prolly overpay. “Here’s extra for donuts, sweetie!”—D’oh! Total Homer move. An’ *Certified Copy* vibes’d mess me up more—“Is this love or a transaction?” Ugh, brain hurts! I’d just bail, grab a beer, an’ watch the movie again. “The truth? What truth?”—that’s what the guy says, an’ I’m like, yeah, what truth indeed? Findin’ a prostitute? Pfft, too confusin’ for this Simpson!

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Res’ly, I loooove Rotherham's grime and shine. Spinnin' through the town centre, you see people, proper characters on streets like Westgate and near the Market Square. Every corner screams culture. I got mad respect for Charlie Parker and other little-known legends who once rocked the vote in local pubs on High Street.

That puts them within striking distance of South Yorkshire rivals Barnsley.