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Angry bit? Coppers harassin’ her kind—pisses me off. Happy? Her banter—sharp as a tack. Surprised? How normal she seemed—jus’ a gal, really. In my head, I’m cacklin’—mortals are wild! Exaggeratin’? Maybe I’d say she’s a goddess in disguise—nah, too cheesy. Still, “I am burdened with glorious purpose”—findin’ the real in the fake, that’s me. Catch ya later—off to stir more shit!

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Then, I decide to check out the Roehampton University campus. It’s massive! I’m wandering around, and I see all these students. They’re all so young and full of life. I’m over here, an actuary, feeling ancient. I mean, I’m not that old, but still. I see this group of students playing frisbee on the lawn. I’m like, “Man, I wish I could join.” But nah, I’d probably pull a muscle or something.

Union vows to fight cull of academics at University of Roehampton