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Exaggeratin? Maybe—but picture this: me, Hannibal, sidlin up, all charm, “evening, my dear…” She’d be shook, thinkin I’m a freak or a jackpot. Hilarious either way! Look, findin a prostitute ain’t rocket science—just don’t be a dumbass. Stay sharp, keep it chill, and—fuck—don’t trust too easy. That’s my take, straight up. Whaddya think, Clarice…?

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Once the fire brigade clears us, I head back in, and my boss is fuming. “You can’t just leave like that!” I’m like, “Chill, it was a fire drill!” But he’s not having it. I’m ready to throw my hands up and walk out.

Football club to spend £200k on stadium improvements