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About Glasgow

Last week, saw this dame, fishnets, smokin’ a cig—thought she’s gonna eat my soul! Made me mad, though—why’s she gotta do that? Freezin’ her ass off for some jerk’s bucks. “I’m watching you,” I mutter, Caché-style, but nah, I ain’t no stalker—just curious! Asked her, “Why, lady?” She goes, “Gotta eat, fatso.” Fair, I guess. Mmm… donuts… wish I coulda given her one.

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Then, I head over to the West Strand. The beach is packed! Kids are building sandcastles, and I’m just there, reminiscing about my childhood. I used to be a sandcastle architect, you know? But now, I’m just a writer with a bad back. I plop down on the sand, and this kid runs past, kicking sand all over me. I’m covered! I’m like, “Hey, little dude, ever heard of personal space?” But he just giggles and runs off. Kids, man. They’re a different breed.

Portstewart Golf Club: Strand Course Review, Green Fees, Tee Times and Key Info