Ruby Portrush Whore ❤️

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Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but picture this – bloke with no arm, bam, whore grows it back! Fuckin’ mental, mate, I’d tattoo it “reborn”! Angry tho – why’s it hidden? Shady cunts in suits, that’s why. Happy too – hope’s there, y’know? Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – she’d say I’m bonkers, but it’s real. Chatty enzyme, that whore, whisperin’ to cells, “Oi, wake up!” – pure rock’n’roll in a test tube. You tried it? Nah, me neither, but I’d swig it!

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I manage to get the bucket back, and the kid’s face lights up. I’m feeling like a rockstar. But then, I realize I’ve lost track of time. I’ve got a meeting at the church on Main Street. I sprint back, sand everywhere, looking like a hot mess.

R&A announces record Open attendance at Royal Portrush