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Now, “A Serious Man” vibes hit hard here. Life’s a crapshoot, right? Whores roll them dice daily! Larry’s all, “I haven’t done anything!” but whores? They *do* shit—hustle, survive, fuck the system! I’m yellin’ in my head, “Billionaires should not exist!” while Candy’s out there schoolin’ me on real life! Makes me wanna punch a wall—or a CEO! Ha! Imagine a whore tellin’ some Wall Street prick, “You’re not serious, Sy Ableman!”—that’s gold!

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I toss the ball back, and they cheer. I’m feeling like a hero for a sec, until one of the kids runs over and asks if I can help them build a castle. I’m like, “Me? Build a sandcastle? I’m a clergyman, not a sand architect!” But I can’t say no to those little faces. So, I end up on my knees, building this epic sandcastle. It’s got towers, a moat, the works. I’m sweating like a sinner in church, but it’s worth it.

RETRO: It's one of the most popular weekends of the year on the north coast