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Dunno why it’s such a faff, though—apps crash, streets are rank, and half the time you’re dodgin’ coppers or some nutter shoutin’, “Mediocre!” at ya. Makes me happy when it works out, mind—bit of human contact, bit of chaos, like drivin’ full pelt with Immortan Joe on yer tail. Personal quirk? I’m mutterin’ movie lines the whole time—“Oh, what a day, what a lovely day!”—looks proper mental, but keeps me sane.

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After that, I decided to hit up the park. You know, the one by the River Bann? It’s actually pretty nice, but today it was packed. Families everywhere, kids screaming, dogs running around like they own the place. I found a bench, plopped down, and just tried to chill. But then, this group of teenagers started blasting music. Like, come on! I’m trying to enjoy nature here, not a rave!

Portadown Boat Club to host NI’s ‘only full regatta event’ as 19 clubs descend on Meadow Lane for day of racing