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Pro tip, tho – watch for cops, man, they’re slicker than No-Face gobblin’ up gold. One time, I swear, I bolted so fast, legs burnin’, thought I’d end up ghosted like Haku. Ain’t nobody wanna be caught slipin’. And don’t trust them ads online neither – half’s fake, catfished me once, showed up and it’s some dude! Laughed my ass off, but damn, what a waste.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Market Place. You know, the one with the best scones? Yeah, that one. I ordered a latte, and the barista, bless her, totally messed it up. I mean, how do you get a latte wrong? It was like drinking hot milk with a hint of regret. Ugh! I was fuming. But then, I saw this cute dog outside. A golden retriever, wagging its tail like it just won the lottery. Instant mood lift!

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