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What pisses me off tho? Dudes actin like they own these girls. Nah, son! I’m all “truth is, I’m a savage,” channelin my inner Lizzo, ready to throw hands. But then—happy vibes hit! This one chick, Svetlana, she’s signin back at me, smirkin, like “you’re fuckin crazy, I love it.” Surprised the hell outta me—didn’t expect her to know RSL! Thought in my head: “damn, she’s a boss bitch too!”

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, it’s like the sky opened up. I’m running for cover, burger in hand, looking like a drowned rat. I duck into a shop on Bellenden Road. It’s a cute little place, all vintage and quirky. I’m browsing, and I find this ridiculous hat. I put it on, and the shopkeeper laughs. “You look like a right muppet!” I’m like, “Yeah, but a stylish one!”

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