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Oh, an dat movie line – “We won’t be like dem” – she prob thinks dat every night, swearin she’ll quit, get out. But streets pull her back, like gravity, da cruel mistress. Sappy, huh? I get all mushy thinkin bout it, den I laugh – she’d punch me fer pityin her! “Gru, ya softie,” she’d say, an she’d be right.

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Finally, I’m done with the church and head back to my car. I’m starving now, so I swing by this little takeaway on the way. I order a kebab, and the guy behind the counter is super chatty. He starts telling me about his cousin who’s a DJ. I’m like, “Cool, man, but I just want my food!”

Aldi makes next move in bid to open new Oldbury supermarket