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Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” Alright, pal, let’s talk findin’ a prostitute, yeah? Been thinkin’ bout this, sittin’ in my lab, head spinnin’ like a damn top. You ever see “Talk to Her”? That flick, man, Pedro Almodóvar, 2002—hits ya right in the gut. Got me wonderin’ bout loneliness, desperation, all that jazz. “I’ve always depended on the kindness of strangers,” like that line could fit here, twisted up. Findin’ a prostitute ain’t just a transaction, nah—it’s a damn dive into the human mess.

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After that little disaster, I decide to stroll down to Oadby’s park. You know, the one by the Oadby Cemetery? It’s actually pretty nice. I’m walkin’ along the path, and I see this old dude feeding the ducks. I’m thinkin’, “Man, that’s the life.” Just chillin’ with ducks. But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches his bread! I’m like, “What the heck?!” The guy’s flabbergasted, and I can’t help but laugh.

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