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Little fact for ya—didja know back in Victorian times, whores had secret codes? Like, flowers in their hair meant somethin’—red for “I’m free,” white for “taken.” Sneaky, right? Surprised me, blew my twisted mind! Imagine that—pimp strollin’ by, “What’s your totem, babe?” Hahaha! I’d tip my hat, if I had one. Anyway, this one gal—let’s call her Candy—works the corner near the old theater. She’s got sass, tells me, “Cash upfront, clown!” Made me cackle—love the guts!

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So, we head over to the new place, and it’s packed! Like, who knew Aycliffe had this many people? We squeezed in, and I ordered that burger. It was massive! I’m talking two patties, cheese, the works. I took a bite, and it was heavenly. I was in burger bliss. But then, disaster struck. I dropped half of it on the floor! I was devastated. I mean, who drops a burger?

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