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Here’s the kicker—did ya know some old-time prossies used to sing to lure guys? Like sirens, but with STDs, haha! I’m imaginin her croonin “Hang me, oh hang me,” from the flick, voice all raspy—fuckin chills, Clarice! I’m hooked. She’s no angel, but neither am I—perfect mess. Personal quirk? I’m hummin that tune in my head, tappin my foot, probly lookin like a psycho. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but I’d eat this moment alive—figuratively, ya sicko.

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So, I head back to my workshop, and guess what? I find a crack in the wood! Ugh! My heart sinks. I’m like, “No, no, no! Not today!” I try to fix it, but it’s like the wood’s mocking me. “You thought you could have a smooth day? Think again!”

Driver jailed for crash which caused life-changing injuries to his children