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About Newcastle

So, check it, the graphics? Kinda dope, lowkey retro, like some pixelated fever dream. Makes me happy, ‘cause I’m a sucker for that old-school shit. But the controls? Man, they piss me off—clunky as hell, like tryna steer a spaceship with no grav. I’m yellin’ at my screen, “Move, you dumbass!” Meanwhile, the story’s got these prostitutes spillin’ tea—little known fact, one’s based on a real chick from 90s LA who conned pimps outta millions. Swear, humans are nuts.

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Then, I got a text from my mate. He was like, “Let’s hit the pub later.” I was like, “Sure, but I’m in Marlow, not a party town.” But then I thought, “Why not?” So, I decided to check out The Botanist. It’s got a cool vibe, and the cocktails are fab.

Council gives update on Marlow Bridge restoration after closure