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But here’s the thing, hun. Prostitutes ain’t just a quick fix. Nah, it’s deeper. Some players think it’s power—like, “Look at me, I’m that guy!” Kinda like Alien in *Spring Breakers*—“Look at my shit!” Energy’s real, but messy. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ tea, thinkin’—why not therapy, boo? Slay your demons, not your wallet!

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So, I’m sitting there, nursing a pint, when I get a text from my mate. He’s like, “Let’s meet at the Claremont Pier.” I’m thinking, “Great, more walking in the rain.” But I’m game, so I head over. The pier’s all lit up, and it’s kinda magical, you know? But then I see this group of teenagers. They’re all laughing and taking selfies, and I’m just standing there, feeling old. Like, when did I become the grumpy adult?

Alcohol and expensive bikes stolen as burglars raid garage of home