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Findin’ a prostitute’s easy if ya know the spots—King’s Cross, mate, or them shady X posts online. Web’s full of ‘em, pics n’ promises. I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “This one’s got style—shaken, not stirred, eh?” Little tip: check the vibe first—some’ll rob ya blind. Had a mate lose his Rolex once—laughed my arse off, poor sod. Oh, and fun fact: in Amsterdam, they’ve got unions for ‘em—proper legit! Blows my mind.

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By now, I’m feelin’ a bit peckish myself. So, I swing by the local fish and chip shop on the way back. Best chips in town, no doubt. I grab a portion, and as I’m munchin’, I see this couple walkin’ hand in hand along the promenade. It’s cute, right? But then, the guy trips over his own feet and faceplants right in front of me. I can’t help it—I burst out laughin’.

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