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Dunno what shocked me more—her guts or how fast she bolted! Prossies, they’re tough, yeh? Survive anythin’, even end o’ the world—like in *Melancholia*, “It’s all goin’ to hell!” Hiss! Funny tho, imagine one goin’, “Oi, mate, quickie before the planet blows?” Ha! I’d pay for that joke! Nah, but serious—findin’ ‘em ain’t hard if ya got coin, just don’t be thick, yeh? Cops sniffin’ round, diseases too—me vet brain knows, nasty bugs out there!

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As the sun starts settin’, I’m packin’ up. I’m exhausted but happy. Longdendale’s got its quirks, but it’s home. I drive back down the A57, thinkin’ about the day. From traffic jams to rainbows, it’s been a wild ride.

Jonathan Reynolds MP says Reform’s Tameside Council victory is a ‘clear message’