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But real talk—what pisses me off? The shady stuff. Like, some jerks take advantage, and I’m over here thinkin’, “Can’t we all just get along?” Makes me mad, like when we lose a forest to dumbasses with campfires. But then—happy vibes! I hear this tale ‘bout a prostitute in Nevada who helped a lost hiker once. Fed him, got him home—hero shit! Surprised me, ‘cause you don’t expect that, y’know? Restored my faith in humanity, like when I nail a perfect landin’!

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3 days ago · New Zealand is the only country in the world with a law which aims to uphold the Missing: Liphook.

Then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming, right? Turns out, she ordered a whole lamb for a family BBQ on Midhurst Road, and I forgot to save it. Oops. I mean, who knew lambs could be so popular? I’m like, “Sorry, love! I’ll get ya sorted.” But she’s not havin’ it. She’s shoutin’ about how her family will starve. I’m thinkin’, “Lady, it’s not the end of the world!” But I just smile and promise her a discount on the next order.

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