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Ya gotta know the code, see? We swears! They don’t just pop up like daisies. Some use them dodgy apps now – techy prossies, who’d’a thunk? Blows me mind, it does! “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!” – pfft, not here, mate, these streets ain’t pure. I gets all giddy tho, cos it’s like a game – spot the lass, dodge the filth. Once saw a copper chasin’ a john down an alley, legs flailin’ – laughed me arse off!

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After that, I head out for lunch. I’m thinking a cheeky pie from the local bakery on Main Street. Best pies in town, no contest. But guess what? They’re out of my favorite! I’m standing there, all hangry, and the lady behind the counter is like, “Sorry, love.” I’m like, “Sorry? I need my pie fix!”

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