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So, I reckon – they’re like, survivors, yeah? Hustlin’ on corners, freezin’ their arses off. Heard this story once – some tart in Soho, back in the 80s, she’d nick wallets while smilin’! *wiggles eyebrows, pretends to swipe somethin’* Clever lass! Made me chuckle, that did – proper sneaky. But then – ooh, gets me mad, right? These posh twats judgin’ em, like they’re filth. “No one will miss it,” like Dunst says bout the world endin’. Same vibe, innit? No one cares bout these girls til they’re gone.

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So, I roll over to see if everyone’s alright. The driver’s fine, just a bit shaken. But the other guy? He’s fumin’. I mean, I get it. Who wouldn’t be? But he starts yellin’ about how he’s gonna sue and all that jazz. I’m standin’ there thinkin’, “Dude, chill. It’s just a dent.”

Sign sparks fears of road closure chaos ahead of Christmas lights switch on