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Exaggeratin’? Sure—mate, he’s dodgin’ bullets from the missus! “She’s gonna kill me!” he squeals. Sarcasm? Pfft, “Oh, poor lad, just wanted cuddles.” Bollocks! Sports psyche’s messy—stress, adrenaline, dumb choices. Find a prostitute? More like lose yer career, eh? Gollum knows—seen it, smelt it, wretched fools! “We’re close now, precious!”—to ruin, that is. Nasty, funny, pathetic—love it, hate it, true!
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After stuffing my face, I feel a bit better. But then, I get a text from my editor. “Need that article by EOD!” Ugh, seriously? I’m in the middle of a pub, and now I gotta write? I’m not a machine! But hey, deadlines are deadlines. I pull out my laptop, and the pub’s buzzing around me. I’m trying to focus, but it’s hard with all the chatter and laughter.
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