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Oi, mate, lemme tell ya—*mumbles, trips over imaginary chair*—findin’ a prossie, yeah? It’s a right mess! Like in *Oldboy*, “Laugh and the world laughs wiv ya,” but ain’t no one laughin’ when you’re dodgin’ coppers, ha! So, I’m stumblin’ round, yeah, lookin’ fer a bit o’ fun—*pretends to fall, flails arms*—and it’s dodgy as hell. Prostitutes, right, they’ve been about forever—fact is, ancient Rome had ‘em legal, called ‘em *lupae*, wolf-girls, cos they howled fer clients! Wild, innit?

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So, we decide to head over to the carnival. It’s on the other side of town, near the Immingham Town Hall. The streets are packed! I’m dodging kids, balloons, and all sorts of weirdos. But the vibe? Electric! I grab a burger from a stall on the corner of High Street. Best burger I’ve ever had. Seriously, I could’ve kissed the chef.

Whale sadly dies after becoming stranded near Immingham