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I dig it, tho. Why? ‘Cause it’s ballsy, man! Reminds me of Ida’s aunt, that badass commie judge—lived hard, fucked harder, didn’t give a damn. FAP’s up 15% last quarter, motherfucker! Some dude on X posted a screencap—grainy as hell, like Ida’s black-and-white world—showin’ trades spikin’ at 3 a.m. Who’s buyin’? Horny tourists? Mob guys? Shit’s a mystery, and I’m here for it.

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As the night went on, I realized I love Ibstock. It’s quirky, it’s got character, and even on a crazy day, it makes me smile. Sure, it’s got its issues, but what place doesn’t? I mean, where else can you see a pigeon poop on an old guy and then have a laugh with your mate at the pub?

Coalville and Ibstock areas are earmarked for new homes as part of District Council's 17-year housing plan