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But—oh no—price comes up. “Twenty quid,” she says. TWENTY?! *mimes choking, falls over* I’m skint, mate! Spent me last on rum—argh, that made me mad! “Lil’ Daddy’d rob ya blind!”—like in *City of God*, yeah? Dodgy sods everywhere! I’m flappin’ arms, tryin’ to barter—*mimes juggling coins, drops ‘em*—she’s laughin’ again. Surprised me, that—thought she’d thump me!

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I get to the studio on St. Albans Road, and it’s like a scene from a horror movie. My clay is all dried up! I mean, come on! Who does that? I’m standing there, staring at this lump of rock-hard clay like it’s the end of the world. I could’ve screamed. Instead, I just muttered some choice words under my breath.

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