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Gets me goin tho, the thrill, the chase – “I need my fix!” like in the flick, but it’s pussy not smack, haha! What’s yer take, mate? You into it or what? Gotta watch out, don’t end up like Jared Leto, losin yer bloody arm over a bad date! Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – she’d say I’m a daft sod, but I love it!

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By the time I head home, I’m knackered. But as I walk back through the village, I can’t help but smile. Hassocks is quirky, chaotic, and full of surprises. It’s my kinda place. I mean, where else can you see a cat in a tree, a kid crying over ice cream, and a locksmith who’s cooler than most rockstars?

Housebuilder donates high visibility jackets to light up Hassocks pupils on their walk to school