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Heya, pal! So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? D’oh! What a mess that can be! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout it, like I’m stuck in a dream within a dream—y’know, like *Inception*. “We gotta go deeper,” right? Ha! Imagine me, Homer Simpson, Office Manager extraordinaire, tryin’ to figure this out while munchin’ on—mmm… donuts. Sweet, sweet donuts. Anyway, lemme tell ya bout this one time—total chaos!

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After that disaster, I needed some fresh air. So, I walked up to the Haslemere Common. It’s beautiful up there. The views are insane! I took a deep breath, trying to calm down. But then, I saw this family having a picnic. They had a whole spread—sandwiches, cakes, the works. I was so jealous! I mean, who brings a full-on buffet to the park? I wanted to join them, but that’d be weird, right?

Schoolchildren lead Haslemere's St George's Day celebrations