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Here’s a fun fact—did ya know back in the 1800s, some prostitutes in the Wild West ran their own saloons? Badass, right? Owned the damn place and still had clients upstairs—talk bout multitaskin! Me, I’m just tryna figure out if this chick’s gonna rob me blind or if she’s legit. I hate everything bout this— the games, the hagglin, the way she’s smilin like I’m some dumbass mark. “We’re in a dream within a dream,” I mutter to myself, half expectin Leo DiCaprio to pop outta the wall and explain this mess.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Wey Hill. You know, the one with the best scones? Yeah, that one. I ordered a latte and a scone, thinking I’m all posh. But then, the barista—bless her heart—totally messed up my order. I got a flat white instead. Like, what even is a flat white? I’m not fancy enough for that! I was like, “Um, excuse me, I ordered a scone, not a flat tire!” She laughed, and I just rolled my eyes.

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